What To Do When You Are Wrong

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Admitting that you were wrong is one of the toughest challenges many of us face. It can be especially difficult when facing someone that means a great deal to you. It is counter intuitive though when often ceding this bit of ego can often be the best remedy for a wrong. There are many psychological reasons for this behavior and it comes naturally to most of us. The confidence required is a learned trait and here are some of the ways that you can master it.

By the way, if you're thinking of divorce, I have a Divorce Survival Toolkit that has crucial information for you- get it here.

Admission

Taking a moment to own up to your mistake is the first and most important step but also probably the most challenging. Something to think about to make it a bit easier is the positive outcomes. There really are no mistakes in life, only opportunities to creatively solve problems and to learn. We all are all going to be wrong about something, but stopping and learning is a huge advantage. Take your wisdom with you to your next opportunity. The chance for reconciliation is the other positive. While there isn't always room for reconciliation, it is almost impossible without admitting your fault in the first place. Focus on these positive consequences rather than the negatives and it becomes easier to face the music.

Remember Your Strength

There is always an easy way and a correct way and the correct way is always the better choice. Owning up to your wrongs is the correct way but this also gives you power over your wrongs. This requires strength and is a major self esteem booster. Many people struggle to access this strength but we all have it and in this process it is important to remember how you've set yourself apart. Confident people make confident decisions and people will recognize this and it is important that you do as well.

Assuming Control

While it is true that you have very little control over the consequences you'll face, you are able to control how you respond to them. By admitting you're wrong, you are essentially putting the ball in someone else's court. You are upholding your end of a trust bargain and they have to reconcile how they choose to respond. Once you've assumed this position, you can accept that you've done what you can. Putting yourself in a favorable position is always a good choice as well. For example, if it's at work, being a good employee or coworker is a great way to have leeway to make mistakes.

Your Quality

Being wrong about something doesn't make you as a person wrong. Low self-esteem will cause you to reinforce your beliefs about yourself which leads to guarding against being wrong, even to ourselves. There is always a chance to show your quality and remember, every human ever has made a mistake, so you're not alone. You probably even have someone in your life who has wronged you that has remained in good standing despite their mistakes. If you're capable of this empathy, other people are as well.

Making It Right

You can't right every wrong in the eyes of another person, but you can always make it right with yourself. If you upset someone in the workplace, ask them what you can do to not make the same mistake in the future. Learn your boundaries with that person and respect them. If you gave a poor performance at something, be it a test or a work project or something else, either do better next time, or find a way to redo it and fix the mistakes. Don't be afraid to ask someone how you can make it right either. In the end, finding peace with your wrongs is the best way to make it right for everyone involved, including yourself.

Admitting that we are wrong is a difficult lesson to learn. For some people, it comes a bit more naturally but all of us have to go through the process. Practice is the only way to get better so make sure to fit these tips into your routine and eventually you'll reap the rewards of your efforts. You'll see your relationships improve, better career performance and much higher self-esteem and there is very little that is more invaluable.

Communication Check Up

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Are you having trouble communicating with your partner?  Try these super strategies for success at communication!

1. During your evening meal together, avoid watching the television, reading the mail or newspaper. Look directly at your partner and have a conversation.  

 2. Ask open ended questions to encourage your partner to open up and talk. Open ended questions begin like this:  

 a. Tell me about...  

 b. What do you think of...  

 c. What was it like when...  

 3. Check your communication with your partner and beware of using "You" messages. These are statements that begin with the word "you". For example:

a. You need to come home by 6:00  

b. You shouldn't do that    

c. You should call me if you are going to be late

     "You" messages are damaging because they make the other person feel bad or that they are being blamed. It feels like you are talking down to them and can put them on the defensive.  

I offer a 45 minute complimentary Clarity Session to show you how I can help you. Click here to book your session now!

Body Language Clues You Should Look For

Communication and Relationships: Body Language Clues You Should Look For

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How many times have you been on a date, and you just can't figure out if it's going well or not. Everything seems okay from where you're sitting, but you wish there was just some way you could get a sign confirming that. Well, it might be sitting right in front of you... you just aren't seeing it. Take a closer look at your date, and look for these three, simple body language tics that can give you a heads-up as to what's going on just beneath the surface.

Signal #1: Leaning In

This one seems obvious, but the obvious signs are sometimes the easiest ones to miss when you're stressing. If someone is leaning in, that means they're interested in you. If you need additional confirmation, look at the direction their body is pushed. If their feet and legs are facing you, as well as their face, you have their attention. That's definitely a good sign, and one you should not ignore.

Signal #2: Openness

Most of the time when we talk about our dates being open, we're referring to their level of honesty. However, open body language is a sign of comfort, and interest. So if your date is closed off, with their arms crossed, their legs crossed, and their head tucked down like they were in a fight rather than on a date, those are all bad signs.

Signal #3: Where Are Their Hands?

While more open to interpretation than other gestures, where someone leaves their hands says a lot about their state of mind. Hands on the table, in plain sight, speaks to a greater level of comfort than hands under the table. If they look like they have something to hide, it might be because they're nervous, uncomfortable, or just not that into what's going on.

I offer a 45 minute complimentary Clarity Session to show you how I can help you. Click here to book your session now!